Words are powerful.

I love cake.

I hate Nickelback (hate is used for their music, not the band members.  They could be nice guys, but their music isn't nice to my ears).

In college, I wrote a paper on morals and how I would never use a certain curse word of the "sh" variety in any paper.  The irony is that I used it 31 times.  (Don't worry, I just did it to prove a point).  That powerful word got me an A.

Song lyrics are powerful.

So if you wanna get to know me
follow my smile down into its curves.
All these lines are born in sorrows and pleasures
and every man ends up with the face that he deserves
Dawes - When you call my name

When kids come to our camps and programs in the summer, we give them a lot.  We give them golf knowledge and life knowledge.  We teach manners and respect, humor, and self confidence.  And we want to make sure every kid has a baseline to learn the important things in life.

We judge their baseline on the most powerful words of them all:  Please and Thank You.

Every boy, every girl, every man, every woman, every robot should have these words hard wired into their vocabulary.

The reason may seem simple:  It's polite.

But it goes deeper than that.

Please and Thank You command respect.  Please and Thank You show other people that you are confident in giving and receiving.  Please and Thank You draw people in, or if they are lacking, push people away.

Please and Thank you can impact a life.

The Saturday before my mom died, my dad called me.  He didn't know what to do.  He said that mom didn't seem right.  Kim (my wife, who has a nursing background) and I went over there to check on her.

When we got there, my mom was sitting in a chair in her bedroom feeling kind of goofy.  She was coherent, and she was still trying to make jokes, but something wasn't right.

My mom was adamant that she did not want to go to the hospital.

I think she knew.

I think we did too.

After much convincing, we brought her into the ER to run some tests.  Deep down, we were hoping something was wrong, and that it wasn't just the cancer taking over.

The doc came back and told us that her levels were fine.

Ironic.  And it wasn't the news we wanted.

Then the doc recommended we start looking into hospice.

Not what any of us wanted to hear.

Throughout my mom's whole ordeal, I was positive and confident that she could beat the cancer.  Now, it was time to face reality.  It was time to face my fear and maybe my realization that it was time for mom to go.

She was half laying, half sitting up in the ER bed when I sat down next to her.

She looked exhausted.  She looked like she was ready.

I started to tear up.

I leaned over and said what I felt.

"Thank You."

Explosion of tears.

I couldn't contain myself.  All my emotions just came flying out.

"Thank you for everything you taught me and everything you gave me."

I wanted my mom to know how much she did for me.  I wanted her to know that she is the reason that I am who I am.  I wanted her to know that she did a great job.

There was never anything I could have given my mom that would have shown how much she did.  So, I just said thank you.

If you knew my mom, it was never about her.  So she did what she always did, turned it around.

"No honey, thank you."

More tears.

It was the saddest I had been throughout the whole process.  My dad, mom, and I crying together in the ER, knowing that our time together would be over soon.

Then, through her tears, my mom said, "We had a good run, didn't we?"

Heck yeah we did.  We had a great run.

Three days later, she died.

So, why am I telling you such a deeply personal story?

To show you this:  We don't need stuff.  We need each other.  The gifts we give don't come in the form of material objects.  The gifts we give come in words and emotions.

We need a baseline.  We need to appreciate the talents of each person.  And we need to let them know with a thank you.

You know how people say that they want to make peace with someone in case they don't see them again?  People want to clear the air or make things right?

Quit worrying about yourself.

If you're not going to see someone again, your mindset shouldn't be focused on me, me, me.  Give the other person something.  Let them know how you feel.

Better yet, don't wait until the time where you might not see them again.  Tell them how you feel now.  Thank them for what they've done for you.  Connect deeper, smile bigger, give more.

Think of who you've had a good run with, or think of someone you're just starting your run with, and thank them.  No gift is better than a real thank you.

The words you use to express yourself are important.

Please and Thank You are important.

I feel like we're on the brink of a revolution.  A time where people can be expressive and emotional and real without fear.  A time where people can connect in meaningful ways.  A time where it's not uncommon for someone to ask, "What can I do for you?  How can I help?, without expecting anything in return, except for a simple Thank You.

So, that's why we make sure every kid knows Please and Thank You.  You're not just sending your kid to us to learn golf skills.

Thank You can be more powerful than you realize.  It can start a revolution.

You may think I'm nuts for believing all this happens on a golf course.  But, it's where my revolution started.  Wanna join me?

Thanks,
Bryan